Wednesday, January 6, 2010

I hope I accomplish what I need/want to do. I pray I finish my bachelors.

I pray that I actually get into a pharmacy program (in either a year or two or a few haha). Here's looking at you Loma Linda & Western University, I had a lack of faith cuz of how hard it is and the fact that I'm not super smart. But I read online that if I truly want to go for it, just do it. I just was looking at back-up options, since it WILL take long.

I have so many plans but I need to accomplish the baby steps first before leaping and saying things.

I looked at nursing as a possible option, its a good career yes, and to all future nurses and nursing graduates you are awesome, you have the drive and determination to accomplish a field that so many ppl are afraid to go into including myself. I'm confident I would be able to handle the workload/hw/school but the thing is IDK if I would be able to handle the whole profession. I was traumatized by the death of my dad a few years ago and it is VERY hard to see people suffering, I cannot handle the ICU unit. I know you can accomplish anything that you put your mind to but I prefer pharmacy.

I currently work at a pharmacy, as a pharmacy clerk I am learning alot, about medications, generics, refills, how to handle certain pts, controlled medications, and insurances. Its quite fascinating and it helps that the ppl I work with are funny, nice BUT serious when its crunch time. Everyday can be like a battlefield, you gotta be ready for anything. But the main thing is that its hard field/program to get into.

I'm planning during the summer *while on break from school, i prolly will take summer classes as well*, to take a Pharmacy tech class, i don't need to do internship hrs since I already work for a pharmacy.

So far I plan on getting my pharmacy tech license, finish my bachelors and go from there. Apply to schools needed and take/improve on classes that I need to do to increase my success. Maybe I'll just be happy with my bachelers but I want to keep pushing for my masters. I was scared to grow up and see my possible future but all I see now is that I'm getting older, I need to stop wasting time, and look at the fact I'm 22 now, no longer 16. Before you know it I'll be 25! then 30... etc.

I want to make my family proud, I've slacked off long enough, I need to just shut up and do it already. I'm very proud at my older sister, she's going to be an LVN soon and she's juggling at being a mom, a wife and she works! AND she's going for her RN when she moves back here to CALI!!!

After college, comes my career and after that THEN comes marriage. Heck me and my coworker already have come up with our weddings, rings *tiffany's with matching wedding band pls* just missing the groom hahaha. I want my own house first, I want out of the desert, I know i'll be back but I just want to temporarily move away from here. Possibly live near LA not too close or too far.

I look around me, everyone's going places and growing up, married, engaged, kids *shudders* sry but i know thats ONE thing I'm not ready for LOL.

I WANT to be engaged or at least in a serious relationship by the age of 25. Hopefully by then I have most of the things I want done. I want my future bf/fiance/husband to at least have a college education, I need someone who has the drive/motivation to succeed and looking at a real career. and no i don't date people from the desert, sorry to disappoint ;] hahaha but the connections here run too deep and besides I like someone already but we're both focusing on other things. I don't think men handle stress as well as women can. But patience pays off and only time will tell. Like an etch-a-sketch we got shook up and seems like its starting all over again. BUT FIRST ME then YOU. I think thats how you're thinking as well.

I promised my mom I would pay for my brother's college tuition and I plan on sticking by that. He graduates in 2013. I'm pushing him to do well in his studies, I'm very sure he'll do well academically. I told him not to screw up like I did. I regret some choices I have made but they were made. I have learned.

I need to make things happen. I need to.

I WILL MAKE IT. I WILL FINISH. I WILL HAVE ALL THAT I WANT. just give me time =] I'll get there...

Please God, I put all my faith and trust in you. Put me on the path that leads me to a successful and happy future.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

Life is good =]

I got a job at a Pharmacy as a Pharmacy clerk! So far I'm enjoying it, the staff is great and my bosses are kind. School is going well, hopefully I get done!

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

you know your love lif is in trouble when....

your mom, you cousin's grandma AND your aunt try to set you it with someone. and you know you're really in trouble when they say "i want to introduce you to someone, as a friend lang."

I have never felt so awkward in my entire life. A whole party happening on the other side of the room but me in the corner, with my mom, aunt and grandma and the guy facing me. making meaningless small talk. they could have handled it alot better instead of making it so awkward. but of course i was polite, said hi and shook his hand.

so after a few minutes of uncomfortable talk, i was allowed to go back to my other cousins. After that I was teased.

My mom was telling me about how he had his own place, paid off his truck, good job, and all that jazz. He is way older than me. I told my mom I wasn't looking for a boyfriend or husband or anything like that but she said he was nice and that he would be able to give me what i wanted and be able to take care of me. i understand my mothers concern because i have not really brought anyone home in the past year. I have dated tho just I haven't brought any of them home. i think she fears that i will be an old maid. lol she was kinda contradicted what she has always said to me, not to date. I told her he's kind of too quiet for me, which she rebutted that i too am quiet but i came back saying if i am comfortable with that person i am not quiet. I told her I'd give him a chance IF he has enough guts to court me. I'm secretly hoping he doesn't. But if he does, I should give him a change cuz who knows what would happen. I just don't think we're compatible and nor would we get along.

My mom has disapproved of almost every guy I liked. Psht one time she even stuck up for the psycho guy when i liked this other guy that she didn't like.

I kinda just don't want to deal with bs anymore. maybe i should just get married and that would be the end of everything. ha!

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Laggin'

Man, i was laggin in school but now i've put my ass back in check, settled on a major. soon i'll be done, soon i'll be out of the desert, soon i'll be on my own. i took a lil detour in my life but i'm back. and i'm out for blood nukkas. HA!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Shabam

"Love, never knew what I was missing, but I knew once we started kissin' I found love" - Keyshia Cole'

Put a facade on, so no one knows how you really feel.
Make them think you're a hardcore player, that you don't need to settle down.
Get numbers, flirt a lil, spit your game and strut your stuff.
You keep focused on your school and family because they're the most important right now.
People just don't realize how lonely it gets,
Family, social and school life is great but love life is a minus 8.
How hard it is to put up a front.
Playing nonchalantly at clubs, getting down with thugs.
Whoever waits for you, truely is meant for you.
Don't be fooled by looks, look at his intentions.
Its hard to feel alive when you feel lonely in a roomful of friends.
Couples everywhere, kissing, hand holding, baby this, baby that.
Fellas hitting on you from left and right.
Promising good things, and to never let harm come your way.
Some just want sex, some just want another girl to call.
Its hard to know who is real and who is real fake.
Fooled so many times it ain't a joke anymore.
They told I need to wait, and to be patient.
I don't want to end up "The Godmother"!

Sunday, March 1, 2009

OOOHH GIMMIE!!



ain't it cute?! all girls have that inner secret love for hello kitty.